Banishing Game Shame & Glory To Chaos!
December 20, 2018 by cassn
Last month was my birthday in more ways than one. Yes, it was, quite literally, the day of my birth, but it was also the first day of my life as a full-blown, unashamed, gaming nerd.
You see, up until I landed this dream job at OnTableTop six months ago, I kept my love of board and card games as a quiet hobby. Gaming was something I loved to do every weekend with my friends; it brought me immense amounts of joy, yet it remained glaringly absent from my Tinder profile. Gaming was the dirty little secret I kept separate from my ‘normal’ life.
That is until last week when, in a tiny tattoo parlour in Warsaw, a girl called Nikki helped me embrace who I really am (and no, this is not going where you think it is). Nikki was gentle and kind in her touch, and an hour later I emerged a new woman reborn in the blood of the Chaos Gods, with their blessing emblazoned proudly on my neck. And although my tribute may not be visible from the Aethyr, I am a true warrior of the Wastes at last.
However, it soon became apparent I was not alone in my struggle to accept my true calling. Back at the hostel where I was staying, I met two awesome English guys who, when I asked why they had come to Poland, became shy and mumbled something about a ‘card game’.
After a bit of pressing, they admitted that they had travelled half-way across Europe to attend an international Magic: The Gathering Card Game Tournament. I use the word "admitted" because, from the way they muttered and stared at their feet, it was clear that they felt like this huge part of their existence was something to feel ashamed of.
Yet, once I started to talk about OnTableTop and my tattoo, the shy guys I first met immediately disappeared and instead were replaced by incredibly confident, funny men. We became bonded by geekdom, spending the next five days talking about everything from rare cards to deep mechanics.
In fact, the article I wrote earlier this year on board games and dating touched on many of the same topics as I’m touching on now - when we are honest about our passions, that is when our personalities shine brightest. Meeting my friends from England wasn't an isolated event and, over the course of my first week with my geeky tattoo, I met an avid Canadian board gamer, a Ukranian miniature painter, and multiple Polish Warhammer fans who, before my eyes, changed from reserved to exuberant about their hobby once my own geekery was revealed.
Furthermore, my tattoo also provoked conversation among those who hadn’t heard of Warhammer before. Before I knew it, I was explaining the lore of the Chaos Gods and the Old Ones to my fellow travellers, regaling my compatriots with stories of Sigmar and fables of Archaon. Of course, not everyone is as easily seduced by the Four Powers as I am, but a surprising amount really did want to know more about Warhammer lore, how the game was played, and how they get into this new hobby.
A Bright Future...and Chaos Gods
And this is where I return to being so thankful that I work where I do. OnTableTop has just launched the Pro-Store and Cult of Games Members Suite. It's a haven where new entrants to the hobby can go through free painting introductions, gaming tutorials, hobby workshops, and organised play events with other like-minded fans without feeling overwhelmed. More importantly, it's working.
I’ve only been back at work a few days and already I have witnessed so many new faces, eyes wide with excitement at the prospect of playing an introductory game of Age of Sigmar or 40K on one of the demo tables. Indeed, one painting newbie got incredibly excited when he realised he could control the speed of his tutorial videos, pausing when he needed to or tapping John for insider knowledge about the craft.
And look, I’m aware I must sound like some tedious advertisement for our new set-up, but I promise you it’s about so much more than that. I’m genuinely proud to be part of a company who are on a mission to bring out the best geek in all of us.
Tabletop gaming is such a vast hobby, and it’s easy to get overwhelmed or to feel like it’s too niche to join. OnTableTop is seeking to change the narrative of exclusion which too often surrounds hobbying, and, for me, that’s a pretty awesome challenge to be a part of.
So, yeah, I’ve gone full geek. I have my Warhammer tattoo, and I’m privileged to preach about the glory of the Dark Gods to anyone who will listen. And maybe that’s not your hobby. Maybe it’s Burrows & Badgers, maybe it’s Dungeons & Dragons. Heck, maybe it’s Crokinole. It doesn’t matter. Go out and share that knowledge. Bond over it. Try a new hobby, and get others to try yours.
Let’s make a world where gamers never need to feel embarrassed discussing their hobby, or too scared to try something new. Where you’re proud to paint, welcome to wargame, and it’s cool to collect cards. Let’s take geekiness as far as it can go and push hobbying to the maximum.
I’m not saying tattoo your neck but...ah, to hell with it, tattoo your neck!
"...ah, to hell with it, tattoo your neck!"
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@cassn join the club, I have a Battletech Starleague Cross of Cameron on left arm.
Excellent! Clearly we’re the cool ones 😀
Interesting topic though, do remember a friend trying to explain wargaming to office colleagues, mentioning strategy and tactic and trying to avoid the easy description, after 10 mins on getting increasingly confused Tracy (probably why he was trying to avoid embarrassment) looked at me for clarification.
‘Playing with Toy Soldiers!’ I replied.
Funnily enough she could understand that, had no problem with it and wondered why he was so embarrassed!
An ex girl friend once accused me of being in my 2nd Childhood.
I replied ‘Nope never left the 1st!’
Oh my god, someone else knows about Crokinole? Keep preaching the passion!
It’s such an obscure game and I don’t know why!!
I can barely decide what army/game to focus on … so chances of me ever deciding what to tattoo anywhere are so small we would have to invent a new word for it.
Shows like Wil Wheatons’ Tabletop and websites/communities like OnTableTop will help a lot of people embrace their inner child/geek.
It’s good to see the pro-store/club is doing well. I think it is because the team behind it are genuine hobby geeks. That’s the kind of passion you can’t fake and it will attract others who may have not found theirs.
https://youtu.be/gWqLyr4RupY
I think you’re absolutely right, there is so much passion in what we do here, and I think the hard work the team has put in really changes it from a store into a community. I’m so proud to be even a tiny cog in such a gloriously geeky machine!
I also think you’re correct that the whole culture has become a lot more mainstream in recent years, but I still think there’s a way to go before that gamer shame is completely banished to the past. Hopefully places like Beasts of War/OnTabletop contribute to gamer confidence!
As for your tattoo indecision – get them all! Tattoo sleeves are in trend lol!!!
blood for the blood god an fingers crossed for the dice gods
Hard pass for such crude notions from the Bloody Throne. Let the passions of life blur the lines of what is enjoyed. Indulge the senses and live more richly as the path of excess leads to the tower of wisdom!
As far as dice gods… yeah those are truly fickle fiends.
Geekery is a byproduct of having an active mind and when people read the signs of it conversations open up. If you know what you look at and can give the right password people let you in on the literal fun and games that most people just pass over because, as @bobcockayne pointed out, it seems only kids have unrestrained love for life in make believe. All we do is add agreed upon rule systems and run wild from there.
Preach!
I do remember the ol’ high school days of rushing into my room whenever I was bringing a lady home to try and stash the minis and primer before anyone could see. I’d never be able to do that anymore, since my amount of gaming kitsch has far outgrown my available space…
For me, however, seeing Critical Role turn Dungeons and Dragons from a secret shame into a worldwide phenomena, has been highly validating.
Indeed. I think Critical Role and TableTop have certainly helped to get a much bigger following for the hobby but I think a lot of us still ‘hide the primer’ so-to-speak when non-hobbyists come around. I’m aware that I’m an idealist, but I want a world where saying you war game is as accepted as saying you enjoy reading when it comes to hobbies, and I’m pleased to see that places like Cult of Games are working had to make that happen.
Time for me to get a Burrows & Badgers tattoo then, I reckon! 🙂
@brennon and you could get matching ones and become Burrows Brothers!!
Paint miniature penguins and cats. Works every time. 😀
Thank you @cassn for this article and your insights into Game Shame.
And now you have started an interesting Thought Experiment: “so, what would your hobby Fantasy Tattoo be?” Hmmm, let’s see… Dark Angels? Grey Knights? Black Templars? Ravenclaw? Philadelphia Eagles?
Anyway…
Wishing everyone in the BoW / OTT Team and Community a Merry Christmas and a Happy 2019 – with plenty of board-, card- and miniature war-game hobby adventures.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – the geeky medley tattoo sleeve is a trend waiting to happen!!
Merry Christmas @aztecjaguar – may it be full of the people and hobbies you love!
I always find it odd that Gamers aren’t allowed to be who they are over in the UK. Someday I hope to get there and See Ireland with mine own eyes. In America we are who we are and no one really shy’s away from it. We don’t really have clubs like you all do,but there is definitely a feeling of Community in our game stores (moreso in the non-GW stores). I have no problem being who I am and liking what I like and gaming is just part of it. Thank you for the insight.
At the end of the day this is a wonderful hobby with so many facets, art, design, construction, painting, strategy, writing, maths/probability, drama, and… most importantly…. the social aspect.
Coming together and enjoying others company.
It is also a great leveller, it doesn’t matter your background or job, there is a common theme to shared enjoyment.
One of my colleagues look down on it disparaging, the rest (95%) are fascinated by it, and because I’m positive are also positive.
Strangely, computer gaming is considered more socially acceptable, and don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy computer gaming, but, I do not understand how sitting in a room with a headset on is more rewarding than the interaction you have face to face when playing a game.
And from a memory point of view, I can proudly show my nephews the models I have worked on over the years, I doubt they will be as impressed if I tell them I completed various computer games, which I have nothing to show for.
Not getting a tattoo anytime soon, but I tend to wear T-shirts that make it obvious I’m a gaming fan, and have various jackets with geeky patches. Heck, even my lanyard at work has a carefully placed pin badge. (It’s currently “I heart Black Library”.
Great article.
It’s definitely much easier to be a geek these days than it was when I was growing up, although I suspect that part of that is just a reflection of being older, wiser, more confident, and more in control of my life and who I interact with.
I wouldn’t say I shove my gaming hobby down people’s throats the first opportunity I get, and there are still aspects of the hobby that are a source of some shame (the sheer quantity of stuff I have, for starters!), but I agree – being open about gaming opens far more doors than it closes.
I put it on my tinder profile, although she wasn’t a gamer when I met her, we’ve now been together nearly two years and she’s quite the fan of Pandemic, Mythic Battles: Pantheon and even came to Salute last year!
Fantastic article! Also, story time!
The entirety of my public education was spent in a rural town in the Midwestern United States. The culture of the area made it questionable to like video games, which I already had a passion for. For tabletop games like D&D, Magic: The Gathering, etc., though, it was social taboo, and not just in the sense of “haha, loser!” The Satanic Panic of the 1980s was before my time, but in this town, it was still alive and well. It was rare to meet another person who wasn’t a Christian, and even rarer to meet a Christian who thought D&D wasn’t a tool of Satan. I was raised Christian, and still am one to this day. I avoided games like D&D, because adults would tell me why it was evil, and I didn’t want to kick the hornet’s nest in my town. Towards the end of my senior year of high school, I learned more about tabletop RPGs through word of mouth, and I started doubting the narrative I had been hearing. I moved to Arizona, where I went to college, and met people who talked about D&D openly. It was here that I discovered that the narrative of the church surrounding D&D was primarily based on misinformation and lack of understanding. Game mechanics I was told existed were never even there to begin with. For example, instead of casting Fireball by rolling a D20 to see if you hit, it was “casting Fireball by literally performing a blood sacrifice to summon the fires of Hell.” I didn’t know dice were involved for years, by the way.
Let me be clear, I always had a lot of skepticism surrounding how accurate the claims of the adults in my church actually were. Still, showing interest in it would have been seen as more than shameful to them, because it meant I “had the Devil in me.” I didn’t realize that Gary Gygax himself was a devout Christian until I read more about him later. That knowledge confirmed to me that the church’s behavior surrounding this was the thing that was truly shameful. This experience made it much easier for me to filter what is actually Christian, and what is just a narrative invented by the church.
I now talk about my love of tabletop gaming openly. 40k, Age of Sigmar, D&D, all of the above. I wanted to share this to show that I completely agree with the sentiment that while gaming is more mainstream now, there is still work to do before the stigma is completely gone. Areas still exist where it never became mainstream, and the local culture is fighting hard to keep it from ever becoming more acceptable in that area.
As long as there are still parts of the U.S. and the rest of the world with this mindset, there is still work to do in removing the stigma.
Again, fantastic article! I make a point to not let my hobbies define who I am as a person, but I acknowledge them as an extremely important part of my life. I’m glad I can talk about my interests now without being demonized for them, because sharing your interests is much healthier than keeping them to yourself. Nerdy interests don’t hurt anyone, and I want more people to see that. Keep up the work in doing your part, as well! 😀